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Bleu can see two vehicles on his tail as the park he was smashing his way through inexplicably transforms into a mountain road. Must be Hanna-Barbara's doing. With an evil grin, he presses another switvh on his dash. "Let's see how you both handle an oil slick... AND MUTTLEY, I TOLD YOU TO DUMP THOSE HOTDOGS!" Muttley looks sad, but he obeys, tossing all his hotdogs directly at Patashu's pilot, as, simultaneously an oil slick sprays across the road behind him. 
Bleu can see two vehicles on his tail as the park he was smashing his way through inexplicably transforms into a mountain road. Must be Hanna-Barbara's doing. With an evil grin, he presses another switvh on his dash. "Let's see how you both handle an oil slick... AND MUTTLEY, I TOLD YOU TO DUMP THOSE HOTDOGS!" Muttley looks sad, but he obeys, tossing all his hotdogs directly at Patashu's pilot, as, simultaneously an oil slick sprays across the road behind him.
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fluffy snugs Vahno, from afar!  
fluffy snugs Vahno, from afar!
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Bleu is knocked clean off his feet, while Muttley snickers again 
Bleu is knocked clean off his feet, while Muttley snickers again
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Niny'ah's demonic Thing is having control over clothing and fabric 
Niny'ah's demonic Thing is having control over clothing and fabric
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The Winter Wacky Race (2022) was one of the events held during the 2022 Winter Olympics. The goal being to take a truly absurd vehicle, and in the spirit of the cartoon from which it drew its inspiration, attempt to navigate a series of hazards to reach the finish line.

A log of the event follows:

--== Event start, 9:30 EST Feb 8 2022 - To about 1-1:30ish AM Feb 9.

Log has been pruned for pages, but OOC has been left in for commentary!

--==

Mako shouts "Ladies And Gentlebeings, start your engines! The Wacky Winter Race will begin in a little bit. INviting all potential racers and prospective judges to the starting line! GEt here via 'park', or s3, e0, and r!" (Public-shout)

SHOUT: 24 folks heard that.

Amy steps off of the floating disk that carried her up.

Amy has arrived.

Ping squeaks, "Alright, I think that should do it..."

Vahno steps off of the floating disk that carried him up.

Vahno has arrived.

Patashu steps off of the floating disk that carried it up.

Patashu has arrived.

Voksa arrives with a floating transport disk held in their mouth like a frisbee.

Voksa has arrived.

Bleu steps off of the floating disk that carried him up.

Bleu has arrived.

Patashu is hastily assembled on the spot and quickly manned by three kobolds as a Toony Dragon Vehicle!

Ping squeaks, "Did 'park' work? (just to check...)"

Storm Heart steps off of the floating disk that carried Storm Heart up.

[OOC] Voksa says, "Park worked!"

Ping squeaks, "Good."

PatchO'Black steps off of the floating disk that carried him up.

PatchO'Black has arrived.

Gwen steps off of the floating disk that carried her up.

Gwen has arrived.

You say, "A reminder that we are in fact seeking racers AND judges, so if you are interested, please let me know, and which you are interested in!"

Gwen drops La Grande Catastrophe Roulante.

Crixaecha has arrived.

J.P. steps off of the floating disk that carried him up.

J.P. has arrived.

Voksa says, "Hello!"

J.P. oohs! and peers up at Vahno. Fluffy...

Gwen says, "Howdy!"

Bleu arrives dressed in a long purple duster jacket and a red and purple striped hat. A mean-looking dog stands besides him. "Well, Muttley, here we are."

Voksa says, "Mako, I am here to judge. In a competition way, not a general judgement way."

Amy brings with her a few crates marked >>EXPLOSIVE<< and a great big boulder!

Patashu rolls up as some sort of... Patashu? Maybe? It looks like a toony, tank scale, hastily put together wheeled vehicle, rumbling and belching smoke. There's three circular hatches on top and the murmurings of kobolds can be heard inside.

You say, "Excellent! I can always use more judges."

Bleu says, "I am Dick Dast... I mean, Bleu, here to race."

J.P. blinks at Amy.

Bleu has disconnected.

Crixaecha's Doom-Flayer is dropped from the aperture in the base of the flying mountain, zipped downward on a heavy tether cable to land with a bounce and a heavy crash. The tether is pulled back up into the ship, and the Doom-Flayer rumbles to life with a series of whining sounds and controlled explosions, swiveling around in place and whirring to life as its great single wrecking-ball, in service as a wheel, pulls it toward the track, erupting momentarily with flashes of green light and puffs of black smoke that seem to arise from the empty air around it.

You say, "If you are racing, I will also need to know what team you are repping."

Bleu says, "Otherwise Other, Mako."

Amy says, "Pah, I'm on your team Mako! Misfits"

Gwen is on that team too. :)

Patashu - the 'PILOT' kobold sticks out of the front hatch and waves to Mako! "U-um, Patashu, racing for Team Dragon, ma'am! I mean..." They get back in the hatch and work the controls, the dragon jaws at the front of the vehicle opening and closing as the lights flash. "Patashu, racing for Team Dragon!"

Crixaecha stands up on the seat of her Doom-Flayer as it turns before stopping, sliding to a halt as its spikes tear up the ground beneath it. She hastily pulls off her helmet, and chirps, "Crixaecha! No team, no... team Crixaecha alone. Yes, yes."

J.P. giggles softly.

Mako dons a pantsuit and gets out a clipboard. "I gotta ask, dem's the rules.

Gwen arrives, all properly dressed for... a piano concerto. :D

Amy wires up the detonator, and reels out a long wire to a genuine Wile Coyote looking push initiator. "Gwen, want to do the honors?"

Gwen says, "Ooooh... Wait, we doing that before the race starts?"

Vahno says, "Oh boy..."

Bleu's car is purple, and vaguely '60s-looking, with a big yellow fin on the roof. It looks just like a car from the old cartoon "Wacky Races."

Amy says, "Of course! I've got it all etched, now I need to develop the stone!"

Voksa puts on both their 'judge' and 'designated cover' sashes.

[OOC] Amy says, "being a judge means you get fancy shoulder pauldrons."

[OOC] Patashu says, "Judge, Jury and Executioner?"

Gwen hees and approaches the detonator. "Yes please! Is there a countdown?"

Athares looks around. Then back to Mako, then Voksa. "Will two judges suffice?"

Amy nods, "On three." Dons her ear protectors. " ...Three!!"

You say, "I'll take more if you're offering!"

Crixaecha perks up, bobbing in place on her hips. She shuts the doom-flayer off and allows it to rest, hopping up onto the ball as the seat sinks backward to rest on the ground. "Explosions?" She chirps.

[OOC] Bleu's car, for reference: https://i2-prod.dailyrecord.co.uk/incoming/article21190488.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/0_JS67546614.jpg

PatchO'Black steps onto a floating, rainbow-coloured pie wedge and is flown away toward the 'park' of the day.

PatchO'Black steps off of the floating disk that carried him up.

Gwen pushes the detonator plunger with gusto!

PatchO'Black opens up the concessions stand.

Bleu is hit by a concussive blast wave.

( **WHABOOOM!* The huge stone bouler is transformed into a nested set of glowy disks an a bunch of flying rubble! )

Bleu is hit by a concussive blast wave, now, rather.

Athares steps over to Mako, Voksa, steps over to them. Smiles and pets on Voksa before having a seat.

Crixaecha squeaks loudly, scurrying in place for a moment before leaping down the shielding side of her vehicle as it gets pelted and run like a giant iron bell at the impacts of the stone. "Enemy fire! Enemy fire... fight begun!" she shouts in a shrill panic.

You say, "ARE you offering? I can be very thick sometimes"

Voksa jumps and sits up, visor suddenly aglow, zapping bits of rubble out of the air! Wagwag.

[OOC] Gwen says, "Meanwhile: Not a precise match, but it's got the spirit. https://assets.classicfm.com/2015/11/bare-bones-1426521074-view-0.jpg :D"

Patashu's 'ENGINEER' kobold hops out of the hatch and starts buffing out scuff marks from errant pebbles. owo;

Athares says, "Honestly I was kind of split whether to judge or participate, but if you're looking for a third, I'll be here."

[OOC] Amy says, "oo."

You say, "So far, I have Bleu, Amy, Gwen, Pata, And Crixaecha as racers. Me, Voksa and possible Athares as judge. Are there any other takers?"

Bleu sends his dog Muttley to congratulate the fellow racers, and totally NOT seed the track with nails.

Voksa says, "Oh, that's just vehicle construction, Crixaecha!"

Crixaecha looks around, twitching her nose in a panic, as she crawls back up on top of her doom-flayer's sphere. She reaches up to slip her mask back onto her head, and pops up onto two paws to twitch her head erratically between Mako, Voksa and Athares. Her voice is a little deeper and more ominous in the mask, as she intones, "Crixaecha, yes, can take judges with. No extra seat, so hang on tight, yes. Better view."

Voksa :D

Voksa scurries over. "I'll report live from the track!"

Patashu . o O ( Is this safe?? )

You say, "Anyone else? Otherwise I'll go over the basics!"

Mako . o O ( Probably not! But it'll be fun! )

[OOC] Bleu says, "Just for clarification, Mako, how is this race gonna work?"

[OOC] Gwen says, "And for those who haven't looked at my vehicle's desc... there is no steering wheel. :P"

[OOC] Mako is getting there!

Vahno climbs over to cuddles up with Athares. Cause.

Crixaecha turns and bobs her head up and down as she looks over Voksa, hopping around them and looking them over. A paw comes up to frantically scratch at the side of her face, but it just clangs off of her metal mask. "Mmmngh... quite large, yes? Maybe too large... hmm... "

Voksa says, "Hmmm. Right."

Amy plants the Engine -- a heavy device t hat seems to be mostly heatsink -- at the very core of the stone formation and pulls the ripcord. There's a sound between a humm and a hiss, and the many stone rings begin moving around!

You page, "If you want in, or just to spectate, the race will be starting shortly! park to join" to Rielle.

Gwen hms?

[OOC] Bleu says, "Wait, are supposed to bring a real vehicle with a description?"

Athares ums... looks to Crix. Well, it is meant to be a wacky race- ah! He smirks, curling his tail around Vahno and pulling him in tight. "Hello Vahno." He rubs Vahno's head.

[OOC] Amy says, "no"

[OOC] Mako says, "No. Some people are just doing so for fun. :P"

[OOC] Patashu says, "up to you, some people did some people didn't"

[OOC] Gwen just did anyway. :P

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Some people did. Some people didn't. Some people arrived -as- their cars. It doesn't really seem like it matters. XD"

Amy's car ends up something like this, but in stone, with a seat at the center! https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/41FCWULmFWL._AC_.jpg

[OOC] Bleu is going full Dick Dastardly from Wacky Races, but I didn't think to make it a real item to show off.

Voksa says, "Woah, cool."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Nice!"

[OOC] Crixaecha's Doom-Flayer is a vehicle she had already built previously, it wasn't made with the Wacky Races in mind specifically.

Bleu twirls his mustache menacingly.

[OOC] Amy says, "Ah dangit, I idn't realize I'd be the second monowheel tonight :p"

[OOC] Crixaecha laughs. "We have a choice to make. We can either be really competitive, or secretly team up for Team Monowheel."

[OOC] Voksa says, "Team Monowheel: One Wheel Good, Four Wheels Bad"

Mako fiddles with a pad, and a flock of drones take off. Most are armed with cameras. One or two have a kobold with a camcorder attached who didn't get the memo. "So! The rules are as follows! There will be five(5) segments to this race. At the beginning of each one, there will be a spoof of the region and any hazards you're gonna have to work with. Every person may have up to 3(three) poses. You're jockying against the area AND each other, but there is no pose order, to allow for the possibility of clever interference. We're working on the honor system, here, because we're all good sports. You do need to cross the finish, but how much of you is left is up to you. Turning your opponents into craters tends to be poor sportsmanship. :P (Not to say I don't expect some Clever Tricks. Remember the source material!) Judges! You are scoring based on Cleverness, Skill, and speed! Toon ink, an a skilled Pit Crew are on hand for Incidents. Questions?

Patashu's kobolds pop out and salute! "Loud and clear, ma'am!" "Patashu won't lose, ma'am!"

Voksa spots a drone flying over and crouches into pounce-pose!

Voksa says, "Er. Ahem."

Amy chirp!

Voksa scurries back to the Judgement Area.

Bleu is already climbing into the Mean Machine, with Muttley snickering at everyone. "It's understood here."

Crixaecha thinks about that, and scurries back up onto her wheel to raise her paw into the air and hop in place.

[OOC] Amy says, "https://www.awkwardzombie.com/comic/salt-the-mirth"

Gwen takes her seat at the piano, patting down her skirts and taking off her opera gloves.

Bleu laughs evilly, and presses a button on his dashboard, waiting for the signal to start.

Amy gets in the drivers' seat and does a few quick tests! REady

Skai steps off of the floating disk that carried him up.

Skai has arrived.

Mako Steps up, getting out a starter pistol. "All right then! On your marks! Get set! *BLAM*"

Patashu rolls up to the starting line, with an engine roar, a belch of smoke and a rattling of metal as kobolds inside nervously poke at clockwork around them!

[OOC] Voksa says, "Wait, I think Crixaecha was trying to ask something"

[OOC] Mako says, "Oop?"

[OOC] Patashu says, "Oh yeah you're right"

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Too late! Action time!"

[OOC] Mako says, "If I miss something, please to be poking me!"

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Ignore question."

[OOC] Patashu laughs!

[OOC] Amy says, "is a pose for the area incoming?"

Niny'ah steps off of the floating disk that carried her up.

Niny'ah has arrived.

[OOC] Patashu says, "assuming so"

( Sector 1: City Outskirts - This is a nice and wide field, bereft of giant holes, deadly mountains, and freezing water. The only problem is that someon's gone and placd a whopping great city on it! Our starting gate is on the edge of this city, and your first challenge is to navigate the streets. Traffic has been cleared, but buildings and the normal hazards of a city have not - Trashcans, side roads, crosswalks, it's all there! It is considered somewhat rude to shortcut through someone's living room, but you do you! Heading onwards, the road moves into the mountains... )

Bleu takes off, but there's a smoke cloud that shoots out of the rear of the Mean Machine. "HAHAHAHAHAH!" he laughs maniacally. And he DOES take a shortcut through someone's living room, smashing through their television set as he drives through.

Crixaecha looks around, pauses for a moment... and then explodes into motion, dashing off of her wheel and to the seat, repeatedly turning a stiff crank before throwing a lever, and causing a series of loud popping sounds as her vehicle whirrs back to life. She slips into the seat as it raises up, locking into place by the powerful gyroscope within, and starts gunning the engines... though a bit slow! The shot goes off just as her engine is warming up, starting to cast off smoke and rattle in place. And when she leans forward and guns the engines, the wheel erupts into a flurry of motion, spinning rapidly in place immediately and tearing up the course beneath it to cast back a torrent of torn-up road, taking a few moments before the spikes really manage to bite into the ground and jerk her forward in an accelerating blur, near the rear of the pack as the rat herself curses loudly, drowned out by the squealing and grinding sounds of her engine. Her seat pivots in place on the first turn, struggling to bite and claw into the street and pull her around the corner, glancing off of a building at the intersection with an explosion of crumbled glass and a cloud of dust, but she bounces off of it and keeps going, chewing up a parking meter that crumples like aluminum foil and disappears beneath the massive grinder.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "am I too late to join?"

Patashu takes off with a BANG, clouds of smoke rushing into the air from both the exhausts at the back and the dragon's nostril as the precious looking toony dragon vehicle rolls forward on its wheels, armour shifting as though always on the verge of falling loose! The 'GUNNER' kobold pokes their head out of the hatch on the central turret, scanning for opportunities to blast a shortcut... "Aha! Vulnerable suburban home spotted dead ahead!" As the dragon vehicle is trundling ahead, a set of cannon shells are launched into the walls... BOOM, BOOM! And down goes the house, the vehicle jostling and shaking around as it plows the fence down, grinds through the front and back lawn, and smashes up the house debris on its way, a whole mess of random drywall and supports bouncing off of plates!

[OOC] Patashu says, "we juuust started, Mako's discretion I'd say"

[OOC] Mako says, "The firing gun JUST started, so if you want I think we can swing it, sec while I past the rules."

Mako . o O ( ... we're insured for this, right? )

Amy's giant stone orrey-wheel spins up with a grinding noise! Its 0-60 time is not the best but the torque is TERRIFIC! It spins, thrums, and clatters down the streets with loud clockwork noises, clink-clink-clink-clink-clink-clink! Street race is not its best environment...

Gwen starts forward, fingers gliding over the keyboard as the piano maneuvers surprisingly deftly through the urban obstacles. Seems like she's wired in the keyboard and pedals to the vehicular controls: https://youtu.be/H1Dvg2MxQn8 She smiles serenely as the grand piano dodges through traffic. :)

[OOC] Mako says, "Aha, and clarificaiton, as per rules, three poses per region, if that was not obvious. :P"

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Right. And no pose order. Could I get clearance when everyone has posed? I might have a hard time keeping track without notification."

( "Curses, that dragon had the same idea I did. Muttley, you know what to do... DEPLOY THE UMBRELLAS!" As Bleu tears through several more houses, cutting a wide swath of destruction through the neighborhood, smashing houses and other cars to bits, the dog leans out of the side and dumps a huge box of opened umbrellas directly into Patashu's path. "TAKE THAT, FIRE BOY!" )

Patashu's PILOT and ENGINEER kobolds poke heads out of hatches to yap at each other! "Incoming umbrella fire!" "I'm on it, sir!" The big turret takes aim at the incoming umbrellas... and FIRES! It's effective. Maybe too effective. Umbrella debris and shrapnel and smoke tarnish the front of the dragon-vehicle, making it cough out smoke as the kobolds look ashen and stunned for a moment, before rubbing their faces. The 'ENGINEER' kobold pokes their head out and huffs! 'Don't get the front of Patashu all smashed up! That's the hardest part for me to reach!' Pouting.

Amy flats her ears. Is she the only one sticking to the course!? The nice thing about a rotoball is it doesn't need to 'turn' exactly, it already is facing any posible direction! Minor scuffs in the pavement on a corner... *BOOSH* "@$#%" There goes a crosswalk sign, dragging behind her with lots of sparks!

Voksa rapidly prints out an expanding list of traffic violations.

Niny'ah rolls a spindly-wheeled racecar to the start line that straightup looks like someone took an open-wheel early-era racer and hit it with a shrinkray - just as the starting gun fires! She plugs in a starting handle, Cranka! Cranka! Cranka! Cranka-puttputtputt. It finally catches and spits out the starting handle, which she grabs and tucks beside the seat before shoehorning herself into the pint-sized racer and wrapping a comically-overlong scarf around her neck and pulling down a pair of goggles, and finally, she's off! The mini-prix is deceptively snappy, even if it's not *fast* by the standards of things... But it looks like that might not matter so much, if she can just swerve arou8nd the pavement catastrophe that is Crixaecha'd trail.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "for anyone wondering, this is the inspiration for Nyn's ride (and FWIW, she's Imp-shifted for lightyness atm) https://youtu.be/bNFFWnAaYyg?t=11"

[OOC] Patashu says, "adorable!"

Gwen's agile piano gathers speed, her skirts fluttering in the wind as she weaves through the chaos. "I could get used to this..." She begins to gain ground on the pack, the music growing louder. "Allegro! Fortissimo!" :D https://youtu.be/BV7RkEL6oRc

[OOC] Mako says, "If everyone hits 3 poses I will go to the next sector, but if you don't want all three, you can also let me know. :P"

Bleu grips his steering wheel, as he shoots through the bedroom of another house, disturbing a sleeping couple and smashing through the closet, trailing clothes off various pointy bits of the Mean Machine. He practically flies across the next street, then lands with a BANG in a park, driving through a hot dog stand. He looks over at Muttley, who is now holding a pile of hot dogs. "NOT NOW, MUTTLEY! Is Patashu gaining on us or not?" The dog peers out, and nods. The kobolds are still behind him, despite the Umbrellas.

Crixaecha's vehicle starts to spark in a burning glow of green flame as her wheel struggles to spin ever faster, to force its mass up to momentum, despite how much of her speed is being lost by tearing chunks out of the road and casting them back into the trail of torn-up ruin in her wake. The faster the wheel spins, the more brightly those green projectors on the sides start to flash, pulling in the invisible weave of probability around her and burning it into a visible emerald glow that washes over her like waves over the bow of a ship. Little gouts of green flame are just beginning to erupt from the ground where her wheel passes, here and there, as though her path through the city were not already obvious enough. Looking to the side and hearing the devastation of collapsing buildings and crashing glass, she pivots in place, her vehicle tearing up ground as it slides and pulls itself in a new path, aiming for a parked car... as the whirring spikes bite into it and tear it into colourful metal confetti, it jerks her upward, nearly all the way up to the second-story of the building beside her and crashing into it, and through it, her great wheel working like a scrap grinder and tearing fragile materials to splinters and dust, before exploding out the other side and toward the street, already swinging around parallel with the road amidst burning green fire and the shrapnel of building materials, trying to pull ahead and cut off Dick Dastardly... or at least pull her up to being nearby his rear bumper, a snarling animal of mechanical fury roaring and chewing up asphalt.

[OOC] Bleu says, "Did you see my third? It hit at the same time as Crix's big pose."

[OOC] Crixaecha can forgo her third pose.

[OOC] Mako is trtacking, dun worry! Pata and Nin got one left if they want, amy too, otherwise next up...

[OOC] Mako says, "Well, nin has two left but might not need em"

Patashu has to really push hard to make a tight turn around a sturdier looking building, the whole vehicle screeching and shaking as the tank turret rocks to the side! The GUNNER pops up with a pair of binoculars, scouting out the Mean Machine! "Sir! They're loaded with hotdogs and ready to fire! Permission to make a pre-emptive strike?" The pilot thinks about it a moment. "Let them! I didn't have lunch today. <w<;" The bluff is called! Though that tank turret's still menacingly pointed car-ward as we proceed to the next bit of the racetrack...!

Niny'ah grits her teeth as she weaves her way between Crix's trail of absolut devastation, torn-up pavement making for a bone-jarring ride. There! a side street that isn't completley demolished! She hauls at the wheel, and pulls a lever, locking up her front wheels and kicking the back end around so she can keep her revs up, shooting off parallel with Crix's path which can be heard as much as seen, even from a block to one side. The scarf, comically-long as it seems to be, whips out in defiance of the wind to grab a streetlight and whip her around the corner before letting go, angling her back in close on Crix's trail, but trying to evade the destruction puts her on the sidewalk (thankfully, she's narrow enough for that) and every joint in the pavement makes her wince - there is essentially no suspension on her little racer.

[OOC] Mako says, "Anyone else? Or on to the next leg?"

PatchO'Black watches from his stand.

Voksa . o O ( Oh, good, that scarf was worrying me. )

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "I think I'll skip my 3rd"

[OOC] Mako says, "Second zone incoming!"

( Dead Man's Drop - Heading up into the mountains, you now move into a more competitive sector - A thin strip of road that is bolted precariously to the side of the mountain range, at best there is room for two vehicles at a time going along it, and even then that might be pushing it. The road is common asphault, and ringed on one side by those flimsy metal barriers, and on the others by the sharp slope of rock that makes up the mountainside. Placed here as a trading pathway, it was in common use for several years before someone came up with the infinitely safer idea of just making a tunnel THROUGH The mountain. Now, it has been derelict for some time. Beware potholes, other drivers, and the occaisional bit of rocky road debris rolled down from above. )

Gwen cackles wildly as the piano-car roars through the wreckage left by the other competitors, striking sparks off metal debris and trailing a few small flames. "FASTER!" https://youtu.be/wXmL55DwuaQ

Niny'ah spies the road narrowing, and glances over at Crixaecha's monstrosity of a monowheel, tucking in her shoulders and hunching down behind the little wedge of a windshield to eke every last bit of speed she can to get ahead of that trail of devastation before it turns the road to impassable rubble

Crixaecha squeals as she flips another lever, while her vehicle hits the paved road and bounces a bit before sacrificing it one spike-bite at a time in her quest for acceleration. Her wheel starts to spin faster, losing all definition in a blur... and while it's spinning so quickly, it doesn't seem to do much for her acceleration or grip at first, grinding at the road too quickly to bite in properly. But those green lights glow into a writhing, unwholesome mass of light that sparks and twines to describe a shell around her vehicle, starting to cast off green lightning bolts that spark onto nearby objects... she loses a bit of ground at first, as she slides sideways and careens off of the far buildings. But when she's finally bit in enough and started building speed again, faster and faster, she begins leaving a smoking trail of green fire in her path, actually seeming to burn the asphalt and ground beneath it. She thunders forward, her engine starting to scream in an almost human voice as it whines ever upward into the highest registers of hearing, pouring out gouts of smoke and flashes of light.

Amy operates a stick-shift, causing her craft to change shape! Two rings at a side, now, the entire road wide... But she's not TAKING the road, which obviously can't support this vehicle. These wheels are chewing into the cliff itself, crunchcruncncrunch, skittering pebbles on the road from above1

Bleu can see two vehicles on his tail as the park he was smashing his way through inexplicably transforms into a mountain road. Must be Hanna-Barbara's doing. With an evil grin, he presses another switvh on his dash. "Let's see how you both handle an oil slick... AND MUTTLEY, I TOLD YOU TO DUMP THOSE HOTDOGS!" Muttley looks sad, but he obeys, tossing all his hotdogs directly at Patashu's pilot, as, simultaneously an oil slick sprays across the road behind him.

Bleu has disconnected.

Bleu has connected.

[OOC] Bleu says, "Sorry, internet issues here."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "No worries."

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvwZLaKapjQ"

Patashu's pilot is munching down on the hotdogs, getting armfuls and jawfuls of them, now WAY too distracted to pilot properly! The race line through the precarious mountainside road is looking very sloppy. The engineer pokes their head out and barks, "Watch where you're driving, pilot!" While the pilot tries to poke at a steering wheel with a foot. "I am watching, trust me!" The engineer barks out "I've got the Mean Machine in my sights, firing now!" And then... The oil slick hits! The whole vehicle starts to spin left, spin right, and... BOOOM! The shell gets fired totally off course! It smashes into the mountain slope instead of the Mean Machine, causing rocks to start tumbling down onto the road, as the dragon vehicle is woozily slipping back and forth, losing speed and becoming a precarious obstruction on the narrow winding road!

[OOC] Patashu says, "You missed nothing Bleu"

J.P. has disconnected.

Vahno has disconnected.

Gwen hrms, her piano bouncing roughly over the uneven road. She adjusts her tune to try and compensate, coming up behind Amy. She puts her goggles in place to protect against flying debris and maneuvers for position, nearly skidding off the cliff at a couple points... https://youtu.be/p_iI1J0bALE

[OOC] Amy says, "bleughhh, my brain is not up to this tonigt"

Crixaecha is surrounded quickly in a shroud of green warping light, the asphalt shards kicked up in her wake quickly starting to transmute into various random solids and liquids. A glint of metal here, a splash of water instantly becoming a puff of steam, even occasionally the glinting of a chunk of raw gold. She had almost forgotten about Dastardly, until she hits the oil slick, just as she turns the corner to come upon the narrow road... and the moment her wheel hits it, biting through and sinking low beneath street level to bite into the ground and throw itself forward, the oil erupts. The street is washed in a bright, flickering orange glow instantly, spreading over the street ahead of her, and covering her wheel now in the limning light of flames as it madly spins. Now a rolling ball of fire, screaming madly and scintillating with wild green electricity, she erupts through the rapidly spreading cloud of thick black smoke, squealing as she tries in vain to lean forward and peer through it, now entirely uncertain of where she's heading...

Niny'ah tries to hug the wall as she nears the oil slick, wary of the Dragonmobile and its erratic course. She's been running hard and her wheels are hot! Hot enough to send up a plume of smoke as she floors it across the oilslick, over-revving till her little racer bounces against the rev-limiter and sending her fishtailing as she fights for control. Meanwhile, the scarf, seemingly with a mind of its own, swats aside debris dislodged by Amy's 'high road' and Patashumobile's cannon blast.

Amy's racer loses grip on the cliffs, bounces unpleasantly on the road, and tumbles down... Amy cats off with a tiny parachute that somehow holds her weight. The racer falls a long, long way ... And hits the bed of the canyon with a considerable explosion.

Niny'ah . o O ( that didn't sound good )

Athares all but jumps, looking back and forth. Queries a camera to check if Amy's alright.

[OOC] Mako says, "Ohdear. Dropping out?"

Gwen acks!, and dodges through where Amy went off the road, peering over to make sure she's okay. With a serious expression, she roars forwards, ducking down as the piano chargs forwards through the flames... https://youtu.be/v8rzHZHi9Zw

Bleu is grinning with satisfaction, as he causes the tank behind him to lose control and start swerving, but that grin fades as the shot goes WIDE! And suddenly tonnes of bolders are smashing down onto the road. "Muttley! Pull the emergency lever! Now!" The dog nods, pulls a lever, and... BANG! His ejector seat shoots him out of the Mean Machine. "NOT THAT LEVER, YOU IDIOT!" Bleu pulls the OTHER lever, and the entire car suddenly bounces up into the air like a bouncy ball, and jumps over the bolders blocking his path. Muttley, meanwhile, opens his parachute and starts to glide back downward to the car.

[OOC] Amy says, "my brain is not up to this tonight"

Patashu is soon not just spinning out of control...but catching on little toony smoking flames as Crix sets the oil slick on fire! The pilot panics, hotdogs thrown into the air in all directions as they try to take control... But it's too late, the dragon-tank-vehicle is hurtling towards the railing, smashing through it! The engineer yelps and jumps out, deploying an Inflate-O-Crane :tm: and falling into the cockpit, snagging the dragon tank by the tail before it can sail too far! It crashes base first against the side of the mountain with a THUMP, and the engineer is slowly winding it up as the other two kobolds hang out of their respective hatches, looking flummoxed =w=; Time loss!

[OOC] Mako patpats. Duly noted.

[OOC] Amy says, "though 'cats off' is an inspired typo"

Crixaecha explodes out of the curtain of thick black smoke too late, as the wall of the mountain looms up over her. Her armour and mask are coated in thick black marks, and she has to constantly raise her paw from the controls to wipe at her lenses and clear them. She squeals and jerks her control to the side, barely able to see past the heat-shimmer of the flames coating her wheel, but the great wrecking-ball smashes into the wall... and then, with all of its gained momentum, starts to climb up it, losing speed constantly as it casts out a hail of stone shards. She panics and starts trying to wrestle control of it back, as it slows down despite the spinning of the wheel, climbing up the mountainside and then... reaching its peak, and starting to tear back down the mountain, unable to keep itself climbing for all of its weight as it leaves trails of green fire carrying it down directly into the road further ahead... and, with a momentous crash, directly through the road completely, sparking like a small green storm that tumbles toward the ground below amidst a cloud of burning debris.

Athares silently calls in the /other/ kobolds to make sure Amy has a crew intercepting where she lands, to make sure she's alright, and at the least help her off the track.

[OOC] Patashu says, "really cool vehicle and taking an early fall is in the spirit of wacky races, glad you could make it out even if only for a bit of the race!"

[OOC] Mako says, "Even just showing up is appreciated. You can still enjoy the rest of the chaos from the bleachers. :3"

Amy is rescued in style, and gets a raspberry snowcone before taking a seat in the bleachers

Niny'ah sees her chance as the Patashumobile pits out, and pulls another lever. There's a metalic Clack! and her racer lags momentarily... then starts picking up speed accompanied by the distinctive squeal of a spooling turbocharger! She checks EGT - the engine can't take this for too long, but it should be enough to let her close on the Mean Machine, scarf whipping behind her - it makes a rude-gesture at Crixaecha with the fringe on the end! And she has to yank on it to make it Stop That.

Crixaecha's voice can barely be heard cursing as it descends toward the base of the mountain on a now-unstoppable crashing path powered by gravity.

[OOC] Mako says, "I think Crix is up to 3, I think. Everyone else I think has one more?"

Vahno has connected.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "I think I'm at 3"

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Oh, I pulled ahead of everyone else this time? That's surprising. Yeah, I'm done for this segment. I thought I'd be last to finish posing."

[OOC] Gwen had.. two and a half? Did one pose that was at the scene-change.

Patashu soon hauls itself aaalll the way back onto the road. One quick fan-blanketing and panel buffing and hammering montage later, the kobolds let out a sigh of relief, and get back into the slightly more disheveled and charred looking Pata-vehicle, rev its engine back up to life with a coughing of clockwork and clattering of metal, and push onwards, now at the back of the pack!

[OOC] Mako says, "ONe left for bleu, and probably Gwen then, else next scene."

Bleu is seemingly leaving everyone behind, having successfully jumped over the blocking bolders. He's lost track of Crixaecha entirely, until BOOM, her vehicle seems to come out of nowhere to destroy a huge hole in the road right before him. "Oh dear!" He pulls his Bouncy Lever again, but the Bouncer is out of juice now, so he plunges promptly down the hole. Muttley, meanwhile, keeps drifting down in his parachute, trying to catch up as the Mean Machine plows its way down through the hole Crix made with a big drill-bit that somehow came outta nowhere.

[OOC] Patashu says, "I gotta say, this is some good Chaos so far"

Borris steps off of the floating disk that carried him up.

Borris has arrived.

Borris wanders in, looking about... "Ah, Hello Gwen, Patchy"

[OOC] Mako says, "RAce in progress, Borris."

[OOC] Crixaecha perks up. "Did you say chaos? Where?"

[OOC] Mako says, "I think you got one more, GWen, otherwise I shall move on."

Borris sits and watches

Gwen focuses on weaving through the debris, an intense look on her face. She skids around the boulders, teetering on the edge and fingers flying over the keys...

( Moving in to the next region! Whiplash Curve - The road descends down the mountain again, now at ground level. Due to a rather potent mishap with a drafing board, a pencil, and a case of the hiccups, this section of road was not built to normal standards. Public safety requirements dictate that the road be lined with concrete barriers to maximize safety, but this does little for the nigh constant hairpin turns the road keeps taking, wiggling back and and forth in a zig zag. The good news is that you can't fall off a mountain. The bad news is, concrete barriers do not help suspension. ... assuming you have any left. )

Gwen hrms, been no chance to use her rocket-boosters so far. She sticks with agility, her piano throwing up clouds of smoke as she drift-turns through the hairpins, hopefully gaining some ground on the other racers. She grins maniacally, hands a blur over the keys. https://youtu.be/oHiU-u2ddJ4 :D

Niny'ah thinks it's her time time to shine! The turbo cuts out with a relief to the ears, and she focuses on hauling her little racer around the tight and twisty curves, light and agile letting her take them at a speed that would make the full-sized Grand Prix cars blush!

Bleu isn't on the road any longer as it is, his drill digging through the earth and then suddenly his car shoots back up out of the ground again, and he smashes back onto the road. Somewhere along the way Muttley got back inside the Mean Machine, too, and as Bleu takes the first Hairpin Turn, he says, "Muttley... Unleash the HOUNDS." The dog nods, leans out, and dumps out a huge box of dog bobbleheads of all different types and breeds.

Crixaecha finishes tumbling to the bottom of the mountain, having to let go of her controls and hang onto the seat for dear life to keep from being thrown clear. Luckily, the impacts and the tumble down the side of the mountain do little to damage her craft, and her iron armour deflects much of the falling debris, the gyroscope keeping the seat stable enough to avoid flipping around and crushing her... but when it finally comes to a disquiet halt, engine frustratingly growling on idle, she looks up and shakes herself. That road... she'd be just as likely to chew through that road and fall a second time, even taking it normally. Her eyes fall to the mountain range surrounding it, and then she looks to the cameras. She grimaces behind her mask and growls, then re-seats herself and guns the engines... not bothering to go back and rejoin the road, she instead coaxes everything she can from the chaos-powered engine spinning that spike-studded wheel, tearing around the mountain base and aiming for an overload route that will take her up and through another gap in the mountains, hoping to rejoin the road on the other side as she tears through the natural beauty to drive herself up and over terrain that could never hope to stand against the roaring, lightning-spewing beast she rides.

Patashu, at the back of the pack, trundles their way down the mountain slope and into Whiplash Curve! The engineer huffs, "She's not made for this kind of tight turning, pilot!" The pilot salutes! "I have just the thing for that - brute force!" And in a gush of toony smoke and a more pronounced rattling and chugging of parts to the beat of an engineer, the tank puts on more speed! Full speed ahead... Crashing into concrete barrier after barrier! Half going through them, half going *on top* of them. All three kobolds bobble-head up and down as the whole tank rattles precariously with every bump! It's hard to say if it's gaining or losing time, but it's at least getting there!

[OOC] Mako says, "To clarify, the zig zagging road is now back down to ground level, so you literally can't fall. Unless you manage to dig through the spin. :P"

[OOC] Patashu says, "I think half of us could do it lmao"

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "unrelated yet perfectly relevant https://hyratel.tumblr.com/post/643987188485390336/cutecutejames-marlynnofmany-this-is-seven"

Crixaecha careens up more gradual slopes, biting into and pulverizing stone as her machine more throws itself up the landscape than drives. She coaxes it back and forth, until she finds her way through a narrow pass in the high peaks... and then, there's a loud explosion of thunder and a flash of green light, a spreading path of emerald flame disgorging black smoke as she tips over and tears down the other side of the slopes! The explosion and the flashes of light, the pealing and cracking sound of every charged green static bolt striking the landscape can likely be heard on its path toward the lowlands by even the racers far ahead of her.

Bleu is now focused on catching up with the two lead cars, so he does the insane: Uses his drill to literally plow THROUGH the curves as opposed to takeking them the normal way. "They'll never beat ME, Muttley!" he exclaims with a maniacal laugh.

Gwen glances behind her and sees Patashu gaining on her. O_O She goes evasive, trying her best to stay ahead... https://youtu.be/NscXXbmAggI

Patashu's gunner has the binoculars out again! "Sir! Source of infuriating incidental music detected!" The pilot's grin is ecstatic! "Fire the Awooga shell!" The gunner salutes, and cranks the turret, aiming and firing! And what is the Awooga shell, you ask? Well, when it explodes on the track near Gwen, it doesn't just erupt into a fireball, but the most piercing car horn AWOOOOOGA you've ever heard, a sonic wave powerful enough to ripple the air pressure and blow loose debris back!

[OOC] PatchO'Black says, "Good night, folks!"

[OOC] Patashu says, "Rest well!"

Niny'ah can see the group gaining on her with every turn, but there's only so much speed she can build up on the relatively short straight sections, meaning powerslides just are not happening! so it's haul left, haul right, gun it! just in time to leans on the brakes and haul around to the left again!

Crixaecha builds so much speed careening down the slopes that the green veil of static light surrounding the front of her craft and washing over her starts to narrow into a longer cone, the great wheel simultaneously powering and being powered by the chaos engine driving the power levels up to the point where the rat is surrounded by sparks and flashes as bits of the iron hull melt or explode off of the machine with sharp pinging sounds. By the time she reaches the bottom to level out on the lowland slopes, she is once again a ball of fire, a comet across the landscape, preceeded by a shell of angry cracking green bolts. She cuts a straight burning path toward the road, roaring toward it and casting up a rooster-tail spray of grass and earth, until she impacts the concrete border with a deafening crack and a shower of burning debris, casting her up into the air where comets really should be... she gets thrown completely over the path of one of the turns, landing and crashing through another concrete border as she wrestles her craft to swing around and try to dig into asphalt once again, grinding along the railing through the turn she's landed in and pulling herself through it with straining metal and the groaning of the iron shell.

[OOC] Crixaecha thinks that a runaway sputnik just won the race.

[OOC] Patashu says, "That would DEFINITELY be a disqualification."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Like I could complain. I'm probably disqualified already. XD I just skipped the entire mountain road section."

[OOC] Mako says, "You qualify as a mobile road hazard at the very least. ;p"

Gwen ACKS!, and fistshakes at Patashu. "Everybody's a critic..." She pats out the flames as best she can, and tries to concentrate on getting around the obstacles as quick as she can... https://youtu.be/qsoBpBuhb5o

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Mako. Thank you. That means a lot to me."

Bleu keeps drilling his way through every curve, gaining on Niny'ah's lead with his sheer determination to just destroy the road by any means necessary. As he nears the end of all the hairpin turns, he plows through a tree, hits a rock, becomes briefly airborne, sails forward, and then SMASHES onto the road just behind Niny'ah, as something from his undercarriage ends up left abandoned on the road as a piece of road debris. That's a driving hazard.

Voksa says, "Oh dear, Gwen's broken out the Mozart... They're in for it now."

You say, "That thing's pretty sprightly for a piano. I'll be more worried if she gets to the 1812...."

Voksa cackles! "She'll have to team up with Patashu!"

Vahno says, "Don't give her ideas."

Patashu's kobolds murmur! "Direct hit!" "Still in one piece!" "Let's ram her!" Yeah!" As more and more concrete obstacles fall to the stubborn dragon-contraption's hull, getting a little more beaten up at the front each time, the thing tries to rock up and over one of the obstacles and smack into Gwen with a rev and a belch of smoke!

[OOC] Bleu is planning to have completely destroyed his vehicle by the time he reaches the end.

[OOC] Crixaecha laughs. There's a reason she's already started describing her vehicle coming apart.

[OOC] Amy says, "Every single one of you is gonna be on teeny tricycles by the finish line. Every single one."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "What?! Sacrilege. Tricycles have -three- wheels. How dare you."

Niny'ah glances back to see the mean machine now right on her tail, time for the Turbo again! Clack! fweeEEEEEEEE! The horriffic road conditions are starting to take a toll on the racer, driver, and engine, and as the turbo spools, her exhaust starts getting a distinctive blue tinge of smoke - that is NOT a happy motor, but she has More Power to launch out of the corners, and that extra built-up speed from that lets her kick the rear end out in the turns.

[OOC] Crixaecha will be on a unicycle.

[OOC] Bleu says, "Played Mario Kart Wii earlier as preparation for this, and it definitely helped."

[OOC] Crixaecha has made all three poses, FYI. Going up the mountain, going down the mountain, and finally reaching the road. She imagines she's probably bringing up the rear by a fair margin now.

[OOC] Patashu says, "I've made my 3 too"

[OOC] Mako says, "ooc Ayone else, then?"

[OOC] Gwen says, "Think I've done my three."

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "yep, I've had my 3"

[OOC] Bleu says, "Done my three."

( Sector 4! Fluffy Bunny Valley - The road here turns decidedly more rocky as you leave asphault and heat onto rocky, rumbly terrain. The region is named after the numerous "Burrows". It seems that there was leftover budget in the local planning comittee, so dozens of tiny criss-crossing over and under pathways run amok along the length of the valley. Dare you go over? Under? Through? )

Niny'ah . o O ( oh no )

[OOC] Mako apologizes for nothing. :P

Mako offers Athares and Voksa USB sticks of Popcorn.exe. o.o

Voksa says, "Oh, thank you."

Voksa gnaws on usb stick.

Crixaecha doesn't quite have the speed to crash through the barricades reliably by the time she gets back onto the road and under control, so she ducks low over her seat and proceeds to swing her perch around left and right as the Doom-Flayer proceeds to pick up and carry as much speed as it possibly can. She doesn't bother to try and corner effectively, merely grinding along the concrete barriers and pulverizing them to worn, crumbled ruins as she slides along them through every turn. By the end, she's managed to milk enough speed from her vehicle, and managed to coax the warp projectors to enough life through the spinning of the wheel to re-envigorate her sparking chaos shield, so the last couple of turns are taken on a straight line to finally crash through the barricades. With the dry rocky land in sight, she cranks her throttle all the way up until it bends against the block, leaving it there as she focuses on steering... resolved not to take her power off of the throttle at all in the upcoming section. It looks like it's pinball time, and soon into the rough terrain, she might be able to already see the dust clouds of the rest of the cars coming into view...

Athares looks to Mako. Smirks a hint, eying aside, noting that he can eat actual popcorn... but perhaps it really is the thought that counts in this case, so he thanks her anyway.

Gwen does her best to warn the locals of her approach by playing really LOUDLY. https://youtu.be/0-7UkgMunyk And steering sharply, that's worked for her so far. She's also trying REALLY hard not to get squashed by Patashu, weaving through obstacles that might slow her pursuer down.

Bleu sees the area up ahead, and he groans. "What idiots planned these roads? Muttley, ready the Rock Laser!" The dog nods and snickers, leaning outside of the Mean Machine to take potshots at the various rocks. Niny'ah is momentarily forgotten, as Bleu drives his drillbit right on through, and starts to head underground again. "Muttley, ready the Olympic Fanfare. We can stop our competitors with the precise notes of John Williams' epic. I've WEAPONIZED it." Muttley snickers again, and pulls out a giant boombox, which starts playing the Olympic theme, and the ground above starts to vibrate dramatically.

[OOC] Bleu says, "https://youtu.be/MCqUESCoB1w"

Patashu's gunner and pilot murmur to each other as the engineer facepalms. "Overhangs, sir!" "Overhangs indeed, sir!" The gunner needs to know no more! The tank isn't quite butting into Gwen's back, but it has a different wildly stupid thing it can do - aim the tank turret at one of those overhead rocky pathways! THUMP! BOOOM! A shell detonates and sends a tumble of rock towards Gwen! And towards 'Patashu' too, but... That's future kobold problems for you!

Voksa says, "Oh no! Overhangs!"

You say, "Beware low hanging tunnels...."

Niny'ah's exhaust is looking distinctly smoky-blue, and the engine is sounding concerningly rough. It's just a little motorcycle engine, it's not mean to have 3 Bar of air shoved down its intake! But it takes it, it just has to last out the end of the race.... EGT high.... open a water drip feed into the intake. It'll rob a little power but it brings the engine temps back down to something survivable, and that's the important part right now. She takes the high roads in this wandering little tangle of roads, the overhead view letting her plan her course even as the pack gains on her by simply ignoring the concept of 'roads'!

[OOC] Amy says, "an engine with an iv drip, now I've seen it all"

Crixaecha leans far down and forward in her seat, using the whipping surface of the wheel ahead to try and shield her from the cutting winds trying to catch in her armour and rip her out of her seat. Though much of the wind seems deflected, impacting against that bright shell of green light ahead of her and being forced out of the way as her roaring machine punctures through the atmosphere, tearing its speed directly from the resolute rock and soul of the land and casting it behind her. Once again, multiple flashes and discordant explosions fill the air around her, and the ground behind is left in a trail of brightly gleaming, and unnaturally writhing green flames. Tearing not just through the air, but through the fabric of probability itself, her roaring engine pulls up into view of Patashu, careening forward like a nail-studded bowling ball glowing with ghostly green flames... following him toward the overhang, and causing the stone that rains on her to erupt into smoke and green fire as it impacts her shell. Taking as much of a straight line as she can, every moment adding precious momentum to her craft... until she starts to bounce, from the musical tremors in the ground, squealing in surprise. Her vehicle is heavy, and it really wants to go straight, but it does catch air here and there as it careens on short shallow jumps that pulverize the ground on each landing impact.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "War Emergency Power"

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "in WWII, there was a little Tell-tale wire that gated the throttle from going past 100%, and it would run a water drip through the intake to keep it from self-destructing"

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "in compbat aircraft *"

[OOC] Amy says, "I knew about WEP, I didn't know about the drip"

Bleu has connected.

Gwen GHAHS! She swerves sharply to avaoid the debris, spinning off into a tunnel off to one side. Where does the tunnel go? *shrug* The pfast piano music fades into the distance as she drops out of sight...

[OOC] Bleu says, "Okay, I definitely missed some poses."

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "Gwen is going full Frets On Fire"

Voksa sits up in the bleachers. "Piano tracking lost."

You say, "I thought that was analog, not midi. What's she tracking? ... wait, no, the other kind. Oh dear. o.o"

Athares looks up a moment. Tries to sync overhead view with Voksa and point to the exit of the tunnel Gwen went into. He is pretty good at sussing out which one it is.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kl2DlqJZGxk"

Bleu has disconnected.

[OOC] Mako says, "Last thing you saw, Bleu? Then I can ask someone to catch you up. >.>"

Patashu's gunner kobold whoops! "Got her, sir!" The engineer grumbles! "Got ourselves in a moment to- yipe!" "Yipe!" Crix rushes right past the dragon-contraption, churning up green flame infested debris! The kobolds are soon fanning at them to try to put them out... As we drive right into our own rock fall! The engineer yips, and unfurls a comically sized umbrella... but it quickly gets put full of holes, rocks denting and bashing into the armour, distorting clockwork out of shape! The pilot is letting her cruise forward with a dopey, neck-drooping expression, while the engineer gets out and starts hammering things back into shape. Nervous eyes on Crix as the craft is, ahem, temporarily just rolling forwards with a lack of koboldpower!

Bleu is unsure if his weaponized Olympic Theme actually did anything at all, so he shoots back up out of the ground with a clouds of rocks and dirt, but unfortunately the roof of the Mean Machine gets ripped right off, turning the car into a makeshift convertible. "Damn, there went our roof, Muttley!" He smashes back onto the road, or ground, or whatever, apparently still ahead of Crix and Patashu.

Crixaecha's wrecking ball jumps with the occasional notes of Dastardly's underground song, taking small leaps through the air... and with each impact, the warp power infused into the iron metal is partially dumped into the ground, resulting in rampant and random crystallized transmutation of the stone and dirt into every common material imaginable, followed by explosions from the impact shattering those instant crystals into shards and dust as it travels through the ground like a sonic reverberation of its own. Her warp-shield flickers and fails as the charge is unintentionally released with the impacts, the projectors guttering as the speed of her spinning wheel struggles to recharge them. Crixaecha turns in her seat to look over her shoulder at Patashu, for a moment, and then turns her face back forward. Without a shield, she holds up her arm to cover her armoured face from rock debris as she tears through the stone, sliding down into a dip in the land and losing a bit of speed as she crushes through the bottom part of an overpass, nearly sending her squirreling out of control... but she refuses to take off of the gas, gaining ground as quickly as she can on the terrain that suits her craft best thusfar.

Gwen suddenly burst forth from a tunnel, trailing smoke and grinning toothily! Spindly cybernetic limbs emerge from her back and join her hands on the keys. "Let's give 'em an encore..." >:D https://youtu.be/PrNqYpYhvAI

Voksa says, "Piano tracking restored!"

[OOC] Mako thinks that 2 from everyone but Crix.

[OOC] Mako says, "There is one segment left, I hope we don't run overlong. >.>"

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "I've only done one"

Patashu's three kobolds all bug-eyes out! "Surprise obstacles! Steer, steer!" "I can't, she ain't moving at the moment!" Pilot cranks at the controls, and the wheels just kind of wobble back and forth with little useful motion! As a result, that dragon head at the front of the vehicle crashes, bangs and bounces off of the chunks of crystal and rock, as the kobolds take cover under hatches! When they come out, they're all busily applying metal patches to all the shuddering gashes and gaps in the hull, that head drooped, one of the eyes smashed out, a horn and an earfin stripped off, jaw hanging loose, machine coughing smoke! Engineer climbs in to try to get the engine working again... with percussive maintenance, of course! BANG, BANG, BANG! Roaring and coughing back to life precariously with a gush of black smoke... and she's back in it, through far behind again!

[OOC] Gwen says, "That was 3 from me."

[OOC] Patashu says, "Looks like 5 segments is going to be a pretty perfect length"

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Gwen, you just emerged from a mountain. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p_c6uQHlhZ0"

[OOC] Mako says, "I'm unable to count, then! Go on, Nin. :P"

[OOC] Bleu says, "I have one more, one sec."

[OOC] Gwen grins.

Niny'ah can *hear* the utter destruction of the other racers behind her. C'mon, c'mon.... She spots a fairly straight section of road, and floors it, turbo lagging for a moment before it catches up. There's a concerning vobration coming from the front end at this speed, but there's no time to pull over and check on things - a moment's loss of concentration would put her behind the rest of the pack and that would put her at a complete standstill due to the demolished course. And then she hears Gwen. Oh no. She's pulled out the Dragonforce. Nothing for that but to hug one side and let her past. But she doesn't let up on the gas, scarf trailing long behind her in the wind, and it gives Gwen a thumbsup as she closes the distance.

[OOC] Voksa says, "bahaha"

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "I am grinning like a GOOF"

[OOC] Crixaecha thinks it would take too many Gwens to play that one, and the piano would explode.

[OOC] Ping giggles.

[OOC] Gwen says, "It would need ALL the Gwens. :P"

Bleu looks over at the dog. "Muttley, that machine is gaining on us. Activate the ROCKETS!" The dog gives a wheezing snicker, and pulls another lever. There is a moment of utter silence, and then... The car shoots forward at Mach One, with a *BOOM* in its wake. Bleu and Muttley are thrust back in their seats, and the Mean Machine rockets toward Gwen and Niny'ah faster than the speed of sound, obstacles be damned!

[OOC] Mako says, "Then I think Nin gets one more if she wants, and then... The Final Challenge."

[OOC] Crixaecha cometh.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "I think I'll skip my 3rd. I don't have a lot to work with"

( Emerging the veritable rat's... no, rabbit's nest of overpasses and underpasses, you reach the final leg, The Frozen Lake! No, that's not it's description, that's the name. Owned by the once illustrious Frozen family, of Frozen Foods fame (If it's not in your freezer, it's not Frozen!) This is a large lake . Oh, yes, it ALSO happens to be completely iced over. Your next leg will take you over the (hopefully!) thick icy surface. It's a more or less straight run, were it not for the poor tread conditions and possibly thin ice! At the far end, the finish line awaits! )

[OOC] Crixaecha does not cometh.

[OOC] Voksa says, "bahaha"

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Farewell, my friends. I will remember you fondly."

[OOC] Mako Should note, she wrote these all in advance. Did not realize how many heavy riders we'd have. :P

[OOC] Voksa says, "I don't know what you mean, frozen lake surfaces and flying wreckingballs go GREAT together!"

[OOC] Ping snrks.

[OOC] Crixaecha's vehicle isn't just a heavy spiked ball of iron that tears through things like an industrial grinder. It's ALSO... producing a lot of flame.

Patashu's kobold crew have just finished getting the whole machine patched back together and in a semblance of functionality as they come up to the edge of the frozen lake, gawking! "It's all over!" "No, wait! Deploy the secret weapon!" "Deploying!" The pilot salutes, preparing for the worst... and then pulls the whole dragon-contraption in a tight sideways SCREEEECH, turning it to face away, neck bobble-heading as the head dangles from side to side, the barely patched together wings unfolding with fwump-FWUMPs and gushes of steam, jaws opening wide, mawcannon extended... and a gush of purple flames erupts out! FWOOOOOSH! The whole dragon propelling itself backwards, not quite taking off, but lightening its load and pushing itself like a jet engine for the last stretch! Probably clearing off a lot of snow and ice behind it too... owo;

Bleu is still going around Mach One, gaining on the front two racers as The Mean Machine shoots out across the ice. Muttley presses a button, and the wheels gain spikes for better traction, at the expense of possibly breaking the ice behind him.

Crixaecha tears out of the canyon, having taken a nearly straight course through the entire thing, erupting from a cloud of smoke, green flame and slightly transmuted dust to land heavily on the ice beyond... and crash through it most of the way. It's a thing of roaring fury, now gurgling slightly as half of it is drowned in the water beneath. Crixaecha chirps loudly and stands up on her seat, looking around for the half-second that follows... before the madly-spinning wheel rips the ice up further, and the entire thing, rat included, sinks immediately and rapidly into the depths beneath the ice, leaving a rainbow film of oil and best-unthought-of elements upon the roiling surface of the water.

Gwen takes a deep breath,leans forward, and pulls the lever to activate the rockets. Bracing to either cross the water or enter it, she plays accordingly as the rockets ignite and she ROARS forwards! https://youtu.be/2aBtDz87UK0

Niny'ah's light weight gives her a possible edge, but she's on street/track tires, definitely NOT set up for lake ice, but she carries her speed from the road to the ice - only way to keep your speed up in conditions like this. The colder air means she can cut off the WEP Drip - and then Bleu's sonic boom sends her sliding sideways into a spin! She cranks on the wheel, yanking the handbrake - and ends up pointing (mostly) the right way and with most of her speed intact, and floors it! That poor little engine...

Vahno has disconnected.

[OOC] Patashu salutes Crix. We'll remember you fondly by your deeds.

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Skips her second pose. -But not her third.-"

[OOC] Patashu says, "Uh oh."

Bleu is kinda just along for the ride, as his rocket engines keep jetting him across the ice at top speed, but he can tell the ice has been destabilized by Crix's incursion into the lake. Ice is starting to crack all around and under him, but fortunately the Mean Machine can turn into a boat in a pinch if need be. "Muttley, be prepared to pull the boat lever. We may need it here soon..." He dares to look back to see how everyone else is doing.

Patashu's airflow conditions aren't ideal given the, well, battering and smashing and quick fixes that have been applied over the course of the race. The whole structure is rattling, parts pinging off of it as it's forced to go faster than it was intended to! The neck is rattling, the purple flame thruster is sweeping slowly off course, and the pilot is fighting the controls, as the engineer is messing with parts! "Keep her steady!" "I'm tryin', I'm tryin!' And of course, the 'back' of the vehicle bouncing up and down means the 'front' is thrashing up a storm. The tail starts to smack at the ice, making the surface all the more precarious, as it starts to fishknife back and forth little by little...

[OOC] Amy says, "i've heard of fishtail, what is fishknife?"

[OOC] Patashu says, "I might mean fishtailing"

[OOC] Patashu says, "or jackknifing or something"

Vahno has connected.

[OOC] Patashu says, "yeah I think I'm thinking of jackknifing"

fluffy snugs Vahno, from afar!

Skai has disconnected.

Skai has connected.

Mako oooh, gonna be a photo fiinish...

Gwen hangs on for dear life as the piano hits an angled section of broken ice and starts pinballing around the frozen lake! Her fingers fly over the keys, desperately trying to regain control and get to the other side! https://youtu.be/6El8B8hJ4Sg?t=43

Niny'ah glances back at the Patashumobile, and steers wide to stay well out of the line of fire, quite literally! It takes a very light touch on the wheel, on the ice like this, but she holds a steady course, exhaust now very visibly smoky. Her scarf makes a worried gesture at the chase-cameras

[OOC] Mako thinks there's one left for everyone?

[OOC] Crixaecha has one more pose, but she wants to wait until everyone else has posed. She figures the last poses will probably be crossing the far end of the lake and getting to the finish line.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNcYdAtnqrA"

Patashu's last ditch attempt to pick up speed and catch up to the rest of the pack seems to be backfiring - the dragon-vehicle is thrashing from side to side, the neck and tail wild and out of control, fire everywhere, the ice starting to melt and crack, as the kobolds all YELP and panic, in a quick flurry of activity! Soon, the ice breaks entirely with a CRACK, and the dragon comically doggy-paddles at the surface of the water as it sinks underneath... but not before that turret swivels around and FIRES one shot towards the finish line! And what's this...? A kobold is balancing precariously on *top* of the comically bloated round, carrying the dragon's busted up head in their hands as they scramble footclaws to not fall off! The shell FWOOMPHS a parachute behind it as it sails towards the end of the course - a practiced maneuver for exactly this kind of problem!

[OOC] Crixaecha laughs, and applauds.

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "This Is Jackass"

( The ice under Bleu's Mean Machine begins to break up visibly now, as multiple vehicles are spewing out flames now, and Bleu looks over at the dog. "Muttley, pull the Boat Lever!" Muttley snickers and pulls the lever, at which point a large inflatable pontoon rapidly fills with air around the car. As the ice disintegrates, it barely slows them down, as they shoot forward with the pontoon. "Muttley, the finish line is in sight! We're probably going to win!" They shoot toward the opposite shore, mostly out of control now as they near Mach Two. This is gonna be a helluva crash. )

[OOC] Patashu says, "I was hoping to crash the whole damn thing and blow it to pieces, but this is also very good. I'm happy!"

[OOC] Crixaecha was planning on exploding in a violent storm of apocalyptic fury on the final stretch. It was gonna involve a cracking of reality, and washes of green fire that twined random patterns through the sky like rivers of flame taking on the shape of burning smoke. But she has to do something different.

[OOC] Mako says, "Pata, A friend has just supplied this: "I guess they didn't Tread carefully" ;p"

[OOC] Patashu says, "Fuck lmao"

Voksa says, "The dragon has jettisoned... Most of the dragon!"

Gwen nearly goes into the lake, the back end of the piano starting to sink into the water, when she gives the rockets one final blast, the piano LEAPING upwards and bouncing across the ice towards the final stretch! https://youtu.be/5Sb3W0ZY-1U

( Most of the dragon gives a thumbs up as it sinks into the Blue Lava, which bubbles after its silhouetted passing. )

[OOC] Bleu's gonna PAYOOOOW and probably enter orbit here soon.

Athares says, "... This gives 'keeping ahead' another meaning..."

You say, "... crash teams, please be at the ready. o.o"

Voksa unfolds wings!

Athares reaches up, asking to climb aboard Voksa.

Voksa scoops Athares up.

Athares, deployable synth, ready to help!

Mako has a team of kobolds ready, with medkit, pile of pillows, fire extinguisher, and hot cocoa. You know, to cover all the bases.... (Last poses, I think!)

[OOC] Gwen says, "I've done my three, unless you meant an /additional/ one."

[OOC] Bleu says, "Me too."

[OOC] Mako says, "For anyone else! I think Nin and Crix have pending"

[OOC] Crixaecha is just waiting for Niny's third pose.

[OOC] Crixaecha has hers all typed up.

Niny'ah watches that dragonhead in 'slow motion' even as Bleu's Mean Machine coneinues to accelerate. She pulls course over towards Gwen's piano, shouting, "I CAN SEE THE FINISH LINE! ICE BLOWOUT AT THE SHORE RAMP!" Crix's earlier plunge into the water sent a shockwave through the water under the ice and it found a weak spot where all the force concentrated.

( The lake roils and churns beneath the ice, with a growing though muffled and distant roar. The ice begins to shake and tremble, diffusing bright sparking green lights through it from deep below, a glow that grows stronger and stronger. And then, suddenly, a bright flash and a crash of thunder as the ice explodes outward near the bank, cast aside by the Doom Flayer as it crashes up and out of the lake, carrying with it a glistening spray of high spikes of water that catch and dance with the green light cast off by the angry vehicle! Its engine gutters and gurgles as water is pushed out of it. But its wheel is spinning, and it's biting into the ground to pull itself forward still, with a half-drowned rat clinging soggy and heavy to the seat, casting off a spray of water from the robes beneath her armour as they disgorge much of the water they've been saturated with. Behind her, the water erupts with a flash of light, freezing into yellow and blue crystal spikes rather than ice, and the air rains with a copper dust as little flashes like green fireflies erupt in the air hanging around her churning vehicle. Like a furious beaching whale, her short bit of air carries her forward on a shallow arc, before landing heavily and jerking forward as the whirling spikes bite in and throw the vehicle toward the finish line... only to find that she's emerged into the back of the pack, all of the water she's just torn through slowing her down for being too heavy to push through with all of her weight and power. Below the ice, still, a trail of green flames that the water is doing nothing to extinguish still inexplicably burn. On the seat of the vehicle, the armoured Skaven hops up and down and chitters what can only be vile curses for all of her poor fortune. )

[OOC] Patashu says, "Coool."

[OOC] Mako says, "Is that everyone?"

[OOC] Patashu says, "S'far as I can see!"

[OOC] Bleu says, "I believe so."

[OOC] Ping applauds.

( The kobolds wave a little checkered flag as the various remains cross the finish line. o.o Then dive for cover so they aren't in the way for the coming to a stop part. )

Mako oh man.... "This is gonna be tricky...."

[OOC] Skai applauds! Needs to slip out for now. :>

( The kobold-riding-a-shell-with-a-dragon-head's jaw drops! "I was told about the flying part! I wasn't told about the landing pa-" BOOM. It was a live ordinance. Whoops! The kobold is toonily charred and ashen, coughing smoke as the dragon head tumbles and clatters off to the side, eyes swirling around as the jaw hangs open. )

Bleu practically flies through the finish line, going Mach 2 with no signs of slowing down. Spectators scatter as what's left of the Mean Machine makes an out-of-control bee-line for the bleachers.

Skai draws up a quick circle of runes, before pushing some magic into it, and blinking away with a burst of arcane energy!

Skai has left.

Voksa was not tempted by land vehicles, but has a strong desire to Fetch now that things are airborne!

Athares, along for the ride, notes to make sure those bleachers are empty!

Niny'ah puts it into a sideways skid, arriving across the finish line In Style.

Crixaecha's Doom-Flayer turns sideways and slides to a stop past the finish-line, grinding up a thick crest of torn soil in a tall mound on one side of the wheel. The Skaven immediately shuts it off and reaches up to pull her mask off, darting down and scurrying around her vehicle, peeking inside the gap between the shell-halves, with a very alarmed look on her face as her nose twitches. She seems more concerned with the flayer, currently, than with her placement on the finish-line, tail whipping agitatedly.

Bleu says, "MUTTLEY, DEPLOY THE PARKING BRAKEEEEESSSSSS!"

[OOC] Patashu says, "What could Crix possibly be worried about? 'Oh no, it got more dangerous'???"

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Yes."

Gwen crosses the finish line in a full spin, reaching the end of the tune and just sitting there wide-eyed. "I'm not dead, am I?"

Patashu's kobold-finisher shakes itself back to its senses, grabs the nearest fishing pole and goes to retrieve its two other crewmates. @w@;

Crixaecha squints and peers into the vehicle, struggling and failing to reach her little paw into the gap. Then she peeks again, and mutters a quick but audible "Uh-oh." Then she turns, without ceremony, and starts rapidly scurrying on a straight line directly away from the finish-line.

Niny'ah says, "Call for EOD!"

( Fortunately, Muttley deploys the parking brake, and the Mean Machine comes to spinning stop smashed sideways into a tree. "I'm okay!" Bleu yells. )

Athares notes to Voksa, "We should grab anyone who can't get away from that in time!"

[OOC] Patashu says, "Ah."

Voksa perks up! And takes off, careening through the air like a pink comet. They crash headfirst into the iron sphere to send it flying lakewards.

Patashu's three kobolds, sopping wet and shaking water off, stare up at the flying sphere hurtling overhead... and start sidling finish-line-away. <w< >w> 9w9

Patashu . o O ( "That's what all the headbutting is training for!" "I wasn't aware there was Olympic Headbutting today!" )

[OOC] Ping says, "Well, this has been quite entertaining."

[OOC] Gwen nods.

( The explosion, centered on the Doom-Flayer, is eerily silent to start with. To the cameras, a single frame of everything being fine will be followed by all colours being bled white toward the edges in the next. The detonation is instantaneous, a moment of silent fury... not only does the explosion make no noise, nothing does. The world is drowned out by the weight of silence. And then, a half-second later, the delayed sound of a cacophonous eruption spreads through the surroundings in its wake, carried on a pressure-wave that can throw a person back almost a dozen feet should they be standing too close. Rippling bands of light fill the air, like an aurora, but with a solid three-dimensional weight to them, as the shards of the Doom-Flayer expand outward in a slow-motion corona of shrapnel. They seem to only be traveling a few feet a second, and even the flames burning the metal itself seem to flicker at a slower rate. All at once, beginning at the glowing heart of that detonation, all of the twining auroras start to ignite, into rivers of smoky fire through the sky, burning with glittering, gleaming green fury. A wave of green fire expands, and then slowly, the rivers of fire vanish, and the rest of the explosion happens in normal speed, shrouding the detonation site in concealing, heavy black smoke. )

Patashu's kobolds are all suddenly whipping out cameras on tripods and recording???

[OOC] Ping giggles.

Gwen blinkblinks. "Huh. Guess it's good I had my goggles on."

Bleu is knocked clean off his feet, while Muttley snickers again

Crixaecha wanders back to the finish-line like nothing happened, alternating two paws and four as she clanks back to her position and crouches near where her vehicle was.

Niny'ah says, "Uh. Crix. What just happened?"

Voksa turns sideways to the explosion! Their 'designated cover' sash is blown right off, ack! But they stand still to watch the devestation unfold, woahh. Eventually they shake the dust and debris off and trot back to sit near Crixaecha.

Voksa says, "Your vehicle is/was beautiful."

Crixaecha looks up to Niny, twitching her nose. "Uhhh... capacitor overload, yes, Crixaecha thinks. Water, yes, good at absorbing warp energy. All of the spinning, yess, had capacitors at maximum charge. And water, well... " she thinks, reaching up to scratch at her cheek. "... water between capacitors and warpfire generator, not good. Warp travels, suffuses. Not insulated."

Voksa says, "Interesting..."

[OOC] Ping is thoroughly amused.

Voksa says, "In case of future incidents, please warn others when something is about to explode."

[OOC] Ping is also quite tired. Way past when she'd normally be asleep. G'night, you all.

[OOC] Voksa says, "gnight!"

Crixaecha chirps and looks up to Voksa, and hops up as she nods her head. "Yes, yes... not perfect, old Skaven design. Crixaecha updated, new technologies, new ideas... still mostly very old." She looks out at the expanding cloud of smoke and raining debris, agitatedly tapping at her chin. "Possible design flaws... "

[OOC] Patashu says, "Appreciation time! Overall, I *loved* how everyone in the race hit a different 'wacky aesthetic' and oozed their own personality. It was a great mix. I really enjoyed Amy's rocktech gyroscope vehicle, even if you were only in the race for a bit before crashing. Gwen's piano-on-wheels oozes weird-interesting flavour, and playing songs for abilities was a clever gimmick. Crix's Doom Flayer proved to be a devastating, dangerous and out of control hazard, and it made for some beautiful descriptions of chaos and destruction. Bleu playing up the Dick Dastardly gave plenty of opportunities to kick start chaos and pick a fight, and you can't argue with the classics, can you? Niny'ah played it straight but with some very specific bits of flavour that are both very Niny'ah and very exciting all at once. The scarf, the mini-racer looking construction, and all the technical details of pushing such a thing to its limits."

Athares pets gratefully on Voksa, then looks to Crixaecha, then around. "Everyone alright?"

Ping is glommed down and swept away by a plastic hippopotamus mouth.

Ping has left.

[OOC] Voksa says, "Thank you, Gwen, for providing the musical score for this event."

[OOC] Niny'ah :D

Voksa says, "Niny'ah, I have an important question!"

Voksa says, "...May I pet your scarf?"

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "I did say I was going to play it straight, did I not?"

Niny'ah says, "uh... sure?"

[OOC] Mako says, "The judges are still deliberating. >.>"

Voksa carefully pats.

[OOC] Patashu says, "I do not blame them. :3 It was a fun time."

[OOC] Amy says, "oh dear. hung jury?"

[OOC] Gwen curtseys. "Thankee kindly. It was also an opportunity to do the race while wearing a formal gown, which I hadn't expected until the last minute." :P

[OOC] Crixaecha laughs. "Niny, the moment I saw your car, I felt this overwhelming sense of guilt for the machine I brought. I think I might have intentionally decided to never get in front of you."

Bleu applauds Crix. "I say, brav-ooo. I'd never have considered rigging the Mean Machine to blow itself up! That's true dedication!"

( The scarf pushes up into the petting not unlike a cat )

Gwen plays another tune to keep things jaunty while the scoring is decided. Disengaging the keyboard from the engine first. https://youtu.be/0ws14FpDnY4 :)

Crixaecha looks back to Bleu twitchily, bobbing her head up and down and tilting it as her tail writhes. "Hngh? What, what? Rigged to explode?" She looks away and then back almost instantly, folding her ears back. "Doom-Flayer not rigged to explode, no. Explosion unforseen. Yes, water, charge in wrong place, rampant transmutation, catastrophic containment failure. Too much charge, too short time, bad place for water. Yes."

Voksa says, "Oh, perhaps waterproofing..."

Vahno says, "So... Where'd you get the scarf Niny?"

Amy joins everyone at the finish line via skyhook. "In retrospect, a stone vehicle was very much doomed"

Niny'ah shushfinger.

Crixaecha looks out at the remains of the Doom-Flayer, twitching her nose as she hops forward a couple of paces. "Mmmngh. So much work lost. Have to rebuild... good machine, yes, good machine... sad, sad Doom-Flayer."

Vahno pokes Niny. "Speak."

Voksa looks out into the lake, back at Crixaecha, then peers into the ice and water... "Want help getting the parts back?"

Niny'ah says, "I pushed some Fashion Magic into it. It's inert when I'm not wearing it."

Bleu lets Muttley handle salvaging the Mean Machine.

Patashu's kobolds gather around Niny'ah curiously. (The discarded head is long since forgotten.) Fashion magic...?

Vahno petpets Niny.

Niny'ah's demonic Thing is having control over clothing and fabric

[OOC] Niny'ah says, "is Imp at the moment, reminder"

[OOC] Voksa says, "Honorary Dragon."

Crixaecha perks her ears up and looks to Voksa, craning her head far up to peer at them as they stand nearby. Her tail flicks back and forth, and she chirps, "Yes. Yes, good, salvage... parts, probably just scrap. But good to recover, to reclaim and clean contaminants, yes." She nods sagely. "Loose warp is not good. Random change-magic, yes... "

Vahno suddenly wonders if he should be wary of Niny, being plush...

[OOC] Gwen says, "Now that I am not rushing to keep up with poses, I will get some ICE CREAM! Oh yes..."

Niny'ah makes a 'goosing' gesture and Vahno feels it!

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Gimme some ice cream."

[OOC] Mako says, "Sorry for delay, almost done!"

[OOC] Crixaecha reaches her paws out and makes grabby-fingers desperately.

Voksa nods, and runs into the lake! They have no hope of swimming, but they walk along the lakebed fine. Running their stabilization field water heats them up enough to make the water sizzle on their surface until they're submerged, and they retrieve pieces of scrap, hopping and splashing around a bit like a dog trying to play fetch.

[OOC] Gwen tries pushing ice-cream sammiches through the internet...

[OOC] Voksa says, "Previous dragon version, but: salvage expert. Only occasionally forgets to check whether or not something is in fact salvage. https://media.chitter.xyz/media_attachments/files/105/488/242/497/083/959/original/ae73cac0da2ada76.png"

[OOC] Crixaecha's head snaps down and to the side to stare at her PC tower expectantly.

Vahno eeps! He'll bap Niny!

Niny'ah ehehehe

[OOC] Crixaecha laughs. "I love troublemakers. Especially when they're well-meaning. They keep life from being boring."

Amy mentions to Mako, probably over radio, "Three is interested in joining team misfits. He's not exactly a mystic, though."

You say, "We accept all comers. I 'll deal with that later, tho. >.>"

Amy says, "For sure. The space race isn't for a while anyway."

Bleu twirls his mustache.

Amy says, "Hey Crix, what team are you on anyway?"

Crixaecha hops over to the lake shore, hopping up and down expectantly and gathering up scrap pieces as Voksa delivers them. She pulls her mask on and raises each piece into the air... even the very heavy ones, courtesy of her piston-bearing power arm... turning them over and examining them carefully, then sorting them into two distinct piles. One of those piles causes the snow to melt around it, and the steam that rises from the evaporating water has a bad habit of condensing and falling back down in glittering glass beads and drifts of yellow or auburn dust.

Mako ahem. "Okay, finally, we're sorted.

Patashu's kobolds gather around for scoring!

Crixaecha pauses and raises her head, looking to Amy. She pauses a moment, agitatedly tilting her head, before her deep masked voice intones: "Team?"

Gwen says, "Oh, workin' solo?"

Amy says, "Understood!"

You say, "Medals are decided, and honestly this was a super hard job."

Vahno picks up Niny.

Gwen listens...

Crixaecha looks to Gwen, and bobs up and down as she nods, flicking her tail. "Yes, yes. Crixaecha solo. Yessss... needs no one, Crixaecha is strong." She pauses. "Solo, yes, but hiring crew. And... engineers." She pauses again. "Crixaecha is solo with benefits. Yes."

Bleu says, "Solo with benefits is my new motto."

You say, "You all raced very well, but as we said at the beginning, placing was not the only factor here. We were also looking at driving skill and cleverness. As such, we dub the scoring thus!"

You say, "BunnyHugger gave me the medal templates as well, so we have shinies. First, Gold place, which shall go to Niny'ah!"

Voksa shuffles ashore, with half of a charred and dented metal sphere hanging over their head. "Hurrah!" they echo.

[OOC] Amy says, "is taht kobolds rolling drums, or kobolds *as* drums?"

Crixaecha bobs up and down, and applauds for Niny'ah. Yes, it's a bit out of character, just don't question it. She applauds and she means it.

You say, "Please remember to @claim your stuff."

Amy chirp! Woo!

Bleu claps. "Huzzah. She gave me a run for my money."

Patashu triple-plauds for Niny'ah!

You say, "For silver, we came up as a tie!"

Gwen applauds for Niny!

Bleu says, "A tie? Oh my."

Niny'ah takes a few beats to register, and then OMGs

You say, "In a combination of clever vehicles and skillful driving, Silver has been split between Patashu's Dragon Surplus Special and Bleu's Mean Machine. :P"

Patashu go 'whoop!' 'whoop!' whoop!' one after the other. The silver medal goes around the pilot, as is tradition :3

Gwen nods and claps.

Voksa takes a step toward Niny'ah, then realizes they should not headbonk with a hat made of contaminated iron. They cast off the dome and scurry up to bonk!

Crixaecha raises her paws again, and applauds.

Bleu bows, and twirls his mustache villainously. "Thank you for the opportunity!"

You hand Silver Medal for Winter Wacky Race (2022) to Bleu.

Amy has to laugh! The first time Dastardly won anything. "Well done!"

Voksa says, "For skillful engineering, wise use of battlefield artillery, and commitment to the bit."

Niny'ah laughing-bonks with Voksa, and grabs the spacedragon's muzzle for a kiss on the nose, Mwah!

( Muttley snickers, but he looks genuinely pleased otherwise. )

Patashu take a bow to Voksa!

You hand Copper Medal for Winter Wacky Race (2022) to Gwen.

You hand Copper Medal for Winter Wacky Race (2022) to Crixaecha.

Crixaecha applauds again, bobbing and... huh?

You hand Copper Medal for Winter Wacky Race (2022) to Amy.

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Oh right, I forgot about the participation medals."

Voksa delicately noseboops, then turns their head sideways and gently homfs around Niny'ah's face, before letting go and sitting up. They do not know how a kiss is supposed to work.

You say, "And yep, everyone who participated gets a medal, even if you blew up partway. :P"

Amy blows a raspberry. :p

Crixaecha rises up to her full though meagre height, and whips her tail back and forth. "Ah! Crixaecha blew up ALL the way. Yes."

[OOC] Mako hopes people like the description on the medals. :P

Voksa says, "Amy, your craft was very cool."

[OOC] Patashu says, "Perfect, thank you"

Bleu would've loved to see how Amy's rock car handled the frozen lake, NGL.

[OOC] Gwen says, "No bronzes, or did that get skipped because of the silver tie?"

Athares smiles, looking to Gwen. "It should be said, I appreciate how unique your method of controls were." And to Crixaecha and Amy. "And the engineering that went into your vehicles."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Gwen got the bronze."

[OOC] Mako says, "Yeah, rules dictate that in a tie we double up one medal and skip the next level down."

[OOC] Mako says, "One gold, two silvers."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Oh. I thought I saw Gwen get handed a bronze."

[OOC] Gwen says, "Nope, just the copper."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "Oh, I see. I just assumed it was bronze then."

[OOC] Mako hopes people had fun, that was the most important part. :x

[OOC] Voksa says, "Yess."

Amy says, "The idea was rushed and while looking cool it wasn't well suited to ... well ... roads in general. I should have gone with a SMOKE vehicle. Or a cardbard one!"

[OOC] Gwen nodnods. :)

[OOC] Patashu says, "It was a lot of fun. I'm glad it went as expected. :D"

Crixaecha chirps quizzically. "Card Bard? Musician who creates songs with tarot draws?"

Niny'ah says, "cardboard would have been interesting"

[OOC] Bleu says, "It was insanely fun."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "That moment when I saw that the last stretch was a frozen lake. XD I wish you could have seen my jaw drop in horror."

Niny'ah has a good look at the meddal, and laughs!

[OOC] Voksa says, "bahaha"

[OOC] Mako says, "Betcha forgot this was a WINTER wacky race. ;p"

Amy says, "Cardboard! A lightweight material made from processed wood. I made an aircraft simulator out of it once."

[OOC] Crixaecha says, "That was a guarantee of me coming in last, even if I had been able to get up the mountain road."

You say, "Please don't forget to @claim your medals."

You say, "Or pass them to your other halves as necessary. :P"

Crixaecha mutters, "Crixaecha has no other half. No, Crixaecha is solo with benefits."

Athares rubs behind an ear, looking aside briefly. "The medal's depiction -is- accurate..."

Voksa says, "Hah!"

Voksa says, "Good job, racers."

Niny'ah says, "how many times?"

[OOC] Bleu says, "I tried to use as many crazy gimmicks as possible."

Voksa says, "How many times whatnow?"

Mako there.

You say, "I am -so- glad people had fun, and I shall clearly have to do this again. :x"

Patashu yaps (from the kob, ": sextuple thumbs up. Thanks for hosting, Mako!"

Crixaecha scurries back to her piles of scrap, sifting over them. She looks around and ponders the pile that's obviously doing odd stuff with its surroundings, and stands up straight, reaching up to turn a valve on her armour. A liquid gurgling can be heard through the tubes in it, and the runes carved into the iron plates start to glow a scintillating green, as do her mask lenses. Then she clenches her fists in front of her, and starts muttering under her breath as green lightning starts sparking and playing over her piston-claw-girded arm.

Bleu says, "Yes, you will. Muttley and I shall return, just as soon as we salvage and rebuild the Mean Machine."

--== Event Log Ends!

Medal Discription: A very shiny [metal] medal hanging on a wide ribbon of iridescent blue that shimmers with notes of green and purple. On the front is the logo of the Olympics, a flame superimposed over a snowflake, and the inscription "SpinDizzy Winter Olympics 2022: Winter Lights". The reverse side depicts several vehicles careening off a mountain. An inscription under the picture reads "WINTER WACKY RACE".

Winter Wacky Race 2022 (last edited 2022-02-25 13:39:07 by Mako)